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Sipa

NABAGSAKAN ng batong buhay sa sapa, putol ang isang buto sa daliri ng kaliwang paa… at the hospital where I was goaded into going, it had to be told that the left foot kept smarting… and if it keeps on doing so, it may get smarter and smarter and ask to be sent to graduate school, or worse, every digit be listed up as legitimate voter.

Wheeled in for confinement, my opinion about room temperature was sought by a shapely nurse aide, “Would like it warmer or colder, sir?”

Instant wicked retort:
“Gusto ko hot na hot! Good for camaraderie and bedminton, let’s turn up the heat.”

That sent her in stitches… it would have been most appropriate in such inconceivable occasion for her to be without a stitch on… that’s conducive to a hard-on.

(That was a senior moment: I thought she wanted it rough, was asking to be pinioned, uh, and that’s still an honest opinion.)


Enero 17, 2010 ang ikalawang araw sa ospital, isinilang doon ang ikalawang apo, si Oyayi!

“Persons born on the 8th, 17th or 26th of any month represent Saturn-- ruler of fate and giver of pain and misery. They are tall with thick hair; walk facing the ground, respect family prestige… are calm, simple, duty-bound, patient, untiring, studious at work, reserved in talk and measure the words as they possess higher wisdom.” That suits my grandson who’ll get to learn on his gramps’ knees in the days to come…


Uh, quite tough growing if there’s difficulty in going—kaya kahit iika-ika, nagtutungo pa rin sa silid ng mag-ina para makita ang apo… na ipagdiriwang nga ang unang kaarawan sa taong ito.

Balik-tanaw na rin pati sa nabaling buto—buto as in bone. Puwede na uling maglaro ng sipa, sipa as in kick… titigas talaga at titibay ang mga hita at binti sa pasipa-sipa. Sa mga bisig nga’y kailangang magtakal ng tig-100 kaldag… pero dalawang sipa lang yata, sipa, sipa or kick, kick… teka muna, bakit iba yata ang tumitigas?

Pero sa pulitika, meron ngang tinatawag na paraan para magkamal ng limpak… sipa at tiyaga—in short, kickbacks.

Matapos nga ang kakatwang aksidente, pinagbawalan na ang inyong imbing lingkod na magtungo pa sa sapa na kalapit sa aming tahanan sa Bulacan… humahango do’n ng tubig na isinasalin sa imbakan ng La Mesa Dam… baka raw kasi subukan kong buhusan ng kung anumang pamuksang biochemical weapons ang tubig, mwa-ha-ha-haw!

Professions of undying love, invitations to wine tasting sessions, paternity suits, e-tickets for two to Coron or Busuanga, notifications of dividends on shares of stocks and other useful things may be sent to habalakibur@hotmail.com.

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