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NEWS


KANI-KANIYA lang na paniniwala ‘yan, ‘dre… hindi pagputol sa samahan ang ihahandog na patalim. Mas mainam gagapin: ang ganitong handog, lubusang pagtitiwala na hindi ito itatarak kailanman sa naghandog… gano’n ang paniniwalang Batangan. Buhay ang ipinagkatiwala.

Nakagiliwan lang kasi ang pag-ahon sa bundok— a mountaineer doesn’t ask for a flat-chested, ehe, he-he-he-he… make that a level playing field. Kaya mas masaya kung may kakabit o kalakip na compass sa puluhan ng handog na patalim-- balisong, bayoneta, gulok o palang na panabas-tubo o kawayan man.

‘Yun kasing compass, laging may hatid na balita… para hindi ko malimutan na ako’y peryodista… who keeps tabs on the monthly period of lovers, sabi nga’y konting proteksiyon bago umaksiyon… ‘di na baleng magmintis, h’wag lang magbuntis.

Sa compass, laging may NEWS.

Hindi naman kasi lahat sasakay sa “dog bites man, that’s history; man bites dog, that’s news.” Mas masaya pa ngang sumakay parang aso—a rear entry bolsters chances of thrusting smack at the G-spot, thereby touching off multiple orgasms…

NEWS… with all the major directions—north, east, west, south—delineated, who’d insist on going to the dogs
?

Gano’n ang gusto ko sa NEWS, makapagbibigay ng malinaw na direksiyon kung saan tayo patutungo…gano’n din yata ang hinahanap sa balita, ‘yung makapagbibigay ng malinaw na patutunguhan… a sense of bearing, even a pride of place, never a sense of loss, being lost, or at a loss…

Sa mga dalubhasa sa furyu o feng shui, katatagai ang compass… bawat bahagi ng lunan ay may katumbas na sangay sa pamumuhay…

Sa hilaga inilalaan ang kulay na itim at bughaw para umasenso sa hanapbuhay… sa silangan nakatahan ang pamilya na magiging tiwasay sa pagtatanim dito ng mga puno… puti at mga kulay metal sa kanluran para sa mga supling at paglikha… timog ang hinaharap at katanyagan na mauuntag ng mga kulay na kahel, pula, bughaw—aapaw ang galak sa lagak dito ng mga bagay na hugis-tatsulok o matutulis, ah, siyam na panulat o siyam na patalim.

Hindi lang paliligo sa balita ang ginagawa sa araw-araw kundi tahasang paglublob, giit nga ni media guru Marshall Mcluhan… aba’y masaya bang magtampisaw-- humigop ng mga katas-- sa ulbuan ng baboy o lumublob sa kumunoy?

Sige na, ‘dre, patalim na may compass na lang ang iregalo n’yo sa Pasko… para maipagduldulan sa sarili na pusakal pa rin akong peryodista, lagi’t laging makikipagbuno sa NEWS… that which engenders bearing, maybe composure and a sense of going someplace with a clear direction… hindi sa ulbuan ng baboy o sa kumunoy.

Oo na, katatagai at katataga ang katumbas ng inaasam na regalong pambundok… kahit na mahirap, sulit ang pagod kapag nakarating sa tuktok… altitude spins off a shift of attitude.

Yeah, no mountain climber ever asked for a level playing field
.

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