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Bulak, Bulok


BOTANTE po ako sa Bulakan.

Nagbabayad din ng real estate tax taun-taon. Sa naturang buwis nagmumula ang bulto ng pondong itinutustos sa pagpapatakbo ng pamahalaang lokal. Sa naturang buwis din humahango ng suweldo ng mga nasa pamahalaang lokal, mula gobernador hanggang sa pinakamababang kawani.

Opo, katulad ko ang nagpapasuweldo sa kanila. Ako yata ang pinaglilingkuran daw ng mga lingkod-bayan. Na pawang lingkod-bayad lang, pwe-he-he-he!

Botante ako sa Bulakan. Hindi mawari ang pagpili sa mga nakaparadang kupal, kumag, kulangot at kurakot na pawang hayok maluklok sa poder.

Meron daw kaming kinatawan—o kawatan marahil-- sa Mababang Kapulpulan o Mahabang Kabuhungan or House of Represent the Thieves. Taun-taon kong mauungkat sa mga pahayagan na ang kaputa-putahan… kapita-pita-pitaka nga pala… ay kabilang sa mga bahag ang buntot na aso ng Malakanyang, lagi’t laging magiging sagabal sa isinusulong na pagpapatalsik sa Numero Unano sa Palasyo, mwa-ha-ha-haw!

Ni hindi inambunan ng kahit sampatak na pork barrel ang lokal na koreo… walang pansuweldo, walang kartero. Kaya ni hindi maiparating sa aming tirahan ang halos quarterly dividends namin mula San Miguel Brewery Inc. at iba pang mga hinihintay na kalatas.

‘Yung aming sangguniang panlunsod? The last time it made its dimwit governance felt, they sent out nitwits to catch dogs in our subdivision… dogs that prevented thieves from their forays in our neighborhood. Indeed, the city government’s anti-rabies campaign was out-and-out pro-robberies, pwe-he-he-he!

Opo, kasama noon sa mga nag-almusal sa Palasyo ang kapit-bayawak sa kapitolyo… na pinakimkim daw ng kapwa gobernadorobo Ben Evardone yata ang pangalan… hindot, marami ka nang utang sa tropa, sisingilin ka namin… ng P500,000 na pampalubag-loob at pampabulag-labas.

Paglilinaw: hindi po niya kasamang nag-almusal sa Palasyo sina Grace Padaca at Among Ed Panlilio… na katulad daw niyang pinatalsik sa puwesto, mwa-ha-ha-ha-happy new year!

We’re not even asking for food on our tables. Why, they haven’t even bothered to check out or ask any decent laboratory to do so about the potability of local groundwater that’s pumped into our households… our water’s brackish, unfit for cooking and drinking. Bathe in it, you’ll be smelly…

Botante po ako sa Bulakan at umiiral po sa aking lalawigan ang kabulukan.


And you want me to participate in an electoral exercise in futility?

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